Dating deal breakers article

12-Jul-2015 06:45 by 10 Comments

Dating deal breakers article - all turkey dating site

If both people are not deeply committed to their own learning and healing, one or both might run from the conflicts.

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Don't fool yourself by telling yourself that you are different than all the others and that he or she would never do this to you.Again, this can be resolved with counseling, but the person lying needs to be willing to do the deep inner work necessary to heal this addiction.If you are neat and your partner is messy, or vise-versa, then you either need to have enough money to hire someone to clean up every day, or you need to reconsider the relationship.If not, you may need to walk away, since you can never be certain whether he or she will stop. If these behaviors are not OK with you, it is unlikely that the relationship will work.Remember, you get what you see -- not what the person tells you will happen in the future. Work If both of you have jobs that are very important to you, what would happen if one of you got a great job offer in another city?If you are a neat person, don't count on a messy person becoming neat, and if you are a messy person, don't count on the neat person relaxing their standards in this area. No matter how in love you are at the beginning, inevitably fears will emerge, such as fear of rejection/abandonment, and fear of engulfment/losing yourself.

One person's protective, controlling behavior sets off the other's protective, controlling behavior, and it isn't long before the in-love feelings start to diminish.

Below are the major dating deal-breakers that I've found in my 45 years of counseling individuals and couples.

Sometimes you can tell right away whether someone smokes or drinks a lot or does drugs, but sometimes, this information takes time to emerge.

Robert was the vice-president of a large company, while Celia had a flourishing practice as an attorney. All seemed fine until an incredible opportunity opened up for Robert -- one that he had always dreamed of.

The problem was that it meant moving to Los Angeles. Some people can commute and maintain a relationship, but this was not realistic for Robert and Celia, since they both wanted to have children.

They realized that if either of them gave up the work they loved, they would feel very resentful. Even though they loved each other, they recognized that their relationship would soon erode if one of them gave themselves up.

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